Wednesday, November 22, 2023

Inertia, I am alone yet still multiple

Life is strange right now. Transformative is another finely appropriate word.
I am alone in a way never before experienced, physically felt.
Inertia:
PHYSICS
a property of matter by which it continues in its existing state of rest or uniform motion in a straight line, unless that state is changed by an external force.
I am strangely aware that if I set a book down on the table, that inertia will compel the book to still be there tomorrow.
Likewise, if I clean the kitchen counters, when I get up in the morning, they will still be clean.
This is a paradox.
It's as if Inertia is a Brand New construct that I have never experienced before. Mostly due to have multitudes of Others, People Inside, Personalities, Alters, who were frequently Out and would move things.
Or, in a similar vein, I would be living with someone who would move things about.
Now, dust can settle. And it is only by my breath, my actions that objects will move.
How far reaching and mind boggling a concept to purpose that only at 60 years of age, have I harnessed my own body and it's actions to a large degree, say, 90 percentile?
Strange indeed.
Inertia. It boggles me.
Like, I swept and washed a section of kitchen floor because I saw that the rays of sunlight illuminated dust and unnecessary particles. Now, that floor area is cleaned and will stay that way for a number of days.
I saw something. I decided to immediately address the problem. Problem temporarily solved.
I know I'm not completely alone in body and mind, for I hear the music Little One "Boss" plays. Just yesterday, for the first time in many weeks, I heard her signature music.
She used to show up at most therapy sessions but since the row of Mid Oct, Boss has not shown up there at all. Thats about a month that she disappeared, withdrew and was not to be found. She may want to finally return to therapy is my guess. And, of course, I will make sure time is allotted if she would like to be present.
I am alone. It feels okay, just different and new.

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