Body memories are one of the most challenging aspects of my MPD. The feel of rope on my wrists or my foot being twisted so much that I thought my ankle was broke are just two examples that I readily recall.
After a therapy session in which I had coconsciousness for the first time, with one of alters that had been confined in leg braces I could barely walk with serious pain in my lower body. I had separated, splintered from that person and her pain for over 50 years. Reacquainting with that alter brought all of her pain into my present.
I could have seen my doctor for my pain. She would have looked me over, found no specific cause and ordered tests that would have shown nothing.
Unfortunately, the very real pain of body memories can make you feel like your crazy or a hypochondriac. You Are Not. You're not making up what you are feeling.
If possible, sit and acknowledge the pain. Write and write about it. Talk with a therapist. I'm so sorry that anyone else has to suffer with these.
Medication, ibuprofen or pain killers do not touch body memory pain. In order to heal, I needed to feel, acknowledge and tolerate the pain that was unbearable to me when I was younger.
It isn't enough that part of me had to endure excruciating pain once...to heal I have to endure the pain twice.
Dealing with body memories is a humbling and courageous experience.
Peace my fellow survivors. I know your struggle. The struggle is real.
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