Well, this hasn't happened in awhile. It's been weeks, more likely many months since we awoke filled with chaos, conflicting and rapid thoughts, rampant anxiety and destabilized to the max.
Anti-anxiety medication First Thing in the morning. We had a chiropractic appointment which we botched because our bone cracker sucks. He's hit and miss. Today, complete miss but we were able to attend, get our treatment and leave Without incident.
Yesterday, therapy, bunch of Usses, working on new focus, learning about Lincoln, the early beginning years of 0 to 5 when we lived there and the details of the rampant sexual abuses by dad and his friends every week.
Yesterday, learned of some "games" played under the card table while the men were between card games. We were fed beer, even remembered the taste of it in therapy.
They'd sit naked, hide coins and a folded dollar bill and make little, way way little Usses hunt for it.
Many under table, rather public naked men games in the living room there which was way different from the one-on-one sexual assaults in the bedroom.
Stirred the pot of new unheard from Peoples.
The Lincoln Peoples and everything that happened to them is our foundation, every thing we are built on. Fixing, helping, healing them, heals all of Usses. They are Core People by default, by their very age. Core means it effects all of Usses. Vital stuff.
It I'd Sooooo frickin' uncomfortable to talk about!! Can I scream that here please?!!!!!
Awful shit man. Just awful.
Hate the work but doing it. Fucking hate it to hell but doing it
