Saturday, June 17, 2017

Being Autistic... No Friends

If I had a nickname that suited me best, it would probably be Unreachable. Being Multiple, MPD as well as Autistic means I'm a double dissociative. I'm not just one step removed from reality but two.
I want to have a friend or two but the process, conscious effort and mental planning seem overwhelming. Previously, it seems that I make friends with neighbors, within survivor groups or through regular contact at a store or office. I really haven't gotten out enough to meet and get to know anyone.
I stopped by Urgent Care today as my week-long cold/ upper respiratory ailment has been slow to heal. I met another good doctor there. He ordered chest xrays which turned out to be normal, ruling out pneumonia. He gave me a couple prescriptions for antibiotics and stuff to help me breathe easier. It's good to know it's probably viral and I should start feeling better soon, although he said the cough could last another 2-3weeks, yikes!
My Facebook account has been hacked and I can't remember my password to get in and fix it. Well, it's time for a break from fb, apparently, although fb is my main source of connection and support. I'll try working on it again this weekend as I'm still too ill to be out and about.
The college has graduation this weekend so the apartment complex is in flux what with students packing, partying, moving in and moving out. The parking lot, as well as the streets, will go from full to empty in the span of a weekend.
My wrist is starting to heal. The two partially torn ligaments seem to be less painful, as subtle range of motion and stretching fail to illicit grimacing pain. The structure of my wrist looks a bit askew, like the sinews and bones have permanently changed shape with the injury, if I'm to trust my ortho guy. Kinda feels nice to stretch and get relief from wearing the infernal splint.
I'm continuing to have issues with my therapist. She inadvertently and gloriously broke the therapeutic trust thingy, so it's very difficult to communicate with her at all and, if I remember correctly, there was zero eye contact with her last session meaning she's lost my respect. I'll see how it goes next week. Not sure whether to stay working with her and get over this or wipe the slate clean and move on. We will see.
It's late at night and quite peaceful. Maybe time for bed.

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